


Feel Alive

by Meredith



Category: SHINee
Genre: Anal Fingering, Asphyxiation, BDSM, Drunk Sex, Fingerfucking, Fisting, M/M, Object Insertion, Rimming, rubber bands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-11
Updated: 2013-04-11
Packaged: 2017-12-08 04:38:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/757130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meredith/pseuds/Meredith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jonghyun’s got Myotonic dystrophy. In a few years his muscles will stop working, but he  really doesn’t want to be remembered of that. In the meantime he tries to enjoy life to the fullest, because all he really wants is to feel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feel Alive

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: Everything that's in the tags.

Key’s fist dented the wall a millimeter from Jonghyun’s left ear. The plaster crackled under his knuckles and fell on the floor, but neither of them noticed. Jonghyun had to throw in all his willpower not to smile at the conviction his lover put into this fight.

“Easy,” he chided gleefully, “don’t hurt yourself, kitty.”

Furry took over Key’s features as he landed a kick against Jonghyun’s knee that had him crumbling down in pain. Now it was his time to laugh.

“Bitch please. I know what I’m doing, mind you.”

By the time he was done talking, Jonghyun was already back on his feet, skillfully ignoring the stinging in his knee. He was experienced enough to know this wasn’t the kind of attack that would cause permanent damage. Besides, Key would never do something to hurt him for life. He hoped.

After a few well executed feigned maneuvers he managed to hit Key straight in the jaw.

“I keep warning you about talking too much,” he grinned.

 They went at it for another twenty minutes or so, before Jonghyun’s knee finally gave out.

“Time out!” he groaned when Key went for the throbbing joint again.

“Already? I thought you would’ve at least held out another hour,” the younger teased, “You getting out of shape?” Jonghyun pouted as he massaged his knee.

“I’m not out of shape,” he huffed, “I just don’t feel like getting my ass kicked even more today.” Key smirked. At least his boyfriend wasn’t too proud to admit he’d lost.

“Maybe you’re just getting old.” Jonghyun’s piercing gaze made a shiver run down Key’s spine. _Good idea, Kibum_ , he thought irritated at himself, _hit him where it hurts._

“I’m not old,” Jonghyun muttered between gritting teeth, “and  you’re only a year younger than me, so shut your beautiful trap and _fuck you_.” Key bit his lips to keep them closed. He shouldn’t have said anything to begin with. Everything regarding Jonghyun’s age was off limits, and Key agreed with that, totally, but sometimes his mouth ran off on its own and he literally didn’t get a say in what he said.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, so quiet it was almost a whisper, but he meant it. They were both quiet for a while, but then Jonghyun stood up and extended his hand.

“Make it up to me?” he asked, and the twinkle in his eyes clearly gave away his intent. Key immediately jumped to his feet, relieved that his lover was willing to forgive him. Again.

 

 

 

Pain. You could say he was a little strange for getting off on it. But the knowledge that the time he wouldn’t be able to feel _anything_ crept closer, made him crave it. It wasn’t even that weird, he just sought after the most intense sensation to prove he was alive. At least that’s what the doctor had said.

He considered himself lucky Key didn’t mind hurting him during sex. Not at all actually. Even the first time he’d been _very_ enthusiastic.

 

«Three years ago»

 _I’m drunk, not stupid_ , he thought, so why did he hear himself say: “A little pain makes it better.” It was Key’s first time doing anything related to sex, even if they didn’t plan on going all the way. How could he expect him to be okay with this right away? _Idiot_. But he’d forgotten that this was Key. Fucking theoretical sex-expert Kim Kibum. Key who licked his hand before wrapping it around Jonghyun’s erection, making him writhe because he wanted that mouth directly on his dick and he asked but Key hesitated and he didn’t want to scare him away. And then Key pinched his balls and he didn’t mind any more, not at all. Not that he didn’t like it when Key decided that keeping his hand wet was too much of a hassle and sucked him off anyway, because “Is this really the first time you’re doing this?” and “Oh my God, if you were a whore you’d make a fortune.” Key only laughed.

When Jonghyun asked if he was enjoying himself he giggled and said: “Yes, very much.” But they were still drunk and some things don’t work so well when one is drunk, namely Jonghyun’s dick. Sure he was hard, very, but he just wouldn’t cum and he was getting frustrated. It wasn’t Key’s fault, ‘cause he was doing a great job, a _really_ great job, it just wasn’t happening. So Jonghyun took over to finish it off. What he didn’t expect was for Key to _strangle_ him. And when he asked if “this was okay?” Jonghyun could only squeak out a weak “yes. Yes!” before Key bent down and nearly bit off his earlobe and his hands were still so tight around his neck and _hell_ …

«End of flashback»

 

No. Key was nowhere near worried about hurting him.

 

 

 

“You want it?” A borderline mean smirk covers Key’s face as he grabs the bottle of lube again.

“Yes!” Jonghyun keens because what else could he do? Key has three fingers up to the knuckle inside his ass and it isn’t enough.

“If someone would have told me you like to be fingered hard when we first met, I would’ve declared them crazy,” Key says as he works in a forth and turns his wrist to get a better angle.

“Not… true…” Jonghyun manages to huff out between breaths, because really Key would’ve looked that someone in the eye and said something along the lines of: “If it’s by me I’m sure _everyone_ would like to be fingered hard.” Jonghyun doesn’t doubt that for a moment.

“Are you contradicting me, bitch?” Key asks and he twists his wrist in a way  that makes Jonghyun unable to answer.

“What, no answer? ‘Cause I’d love to punish you.” Jonghyun lets out a whine, impossible to misinterpret, and Key _pushes_. Deeper, much deeper than before, now only his thumb is not inside Jonghyun’s ass and it’s _not_ _enough_.

“More,” he chokes out and what else can Key do than to give it to him? So he pulls back a bit, ignoring Jonghyun’s dissatisfied groans, and hooks his thumb under the rim of his hole. Before pushing in further, he squirts a new dose of lube on his hand, because they’re gonna need it, really. And then he shoves his hand forward in one movement, he knows it hurts less like this, but still Jonghyun looses consciousness for a few seconds.

When he can think again Jonghyun realizes his body is arcing up on its own and his hole is pulling at Key’s wrist like he’s trying to force him to go even deeper, but Key doesn’t because he knows it would be dangerous. As much as he likes seeing his lover squirm, beg for it, he could never put him in danger. Not really.

“Jonghyun,” Key groans, “You’re gonna break my hand.” All Jonghyun has to say for himself is a heaving moan that doesn’t sound like he even tried to make sense. After a few more thrusts Key retreats his hand, fisting it before pulling out, so the rim of Jonghyun’s ass stretches around it like some obscene rubber band. Rubber bands…

Key jumps to his feet, Jonghyun whining something that sounds a bit like “where are you going?”, and runs to the kitchen. Luckily they’re very organized because he wouldn’t be able to search for long with a dick as hard as his. Besides, he doesn’t want to keep Jonghyun waiting.

After looking inside the small box once he just grabs the whole thing and hurriedly returns to the bedroom. He can’t believe he’d never thought of this before.

“What…” Jonghyun mumbles, “is that?” He’s managed to get himself in a semi-upright position, but he still looks so damn _needy_. Key grins, pulls the lid of the box and throws the rubber bands all over Jonghyun’s chest. The elder’s eyes scan the colorful skin decoration before shifting back to his boyfriend, the look on his face depicting that he doesn’t get what’s going on, but that’s okay. Key doesn’t mind demonstrating. He picks up a blue one, it’s Jonghyun’s favorite color, and stretches it between his thumb and index finger. This is going to be _so_ much fun.

The first snap hits straight on Jonghyun’s left nipple and he screams, high and shrill. Key just laughs. The next one is on his abs (the forth one of his six-pack, but where do you start counting) and the rest just follows, everywhere. Jonghyun doesn’t seem to mind at all.

 

Red stripes mare his skin in a way that even he himself can appreciate, so certainly Key likes it. Somewhere along the way his lover had decided to bind off his nipples with two rubber bands, turning them purple. He doesn’t worry though, Key knows how far he can go, how far Jonghyun can go.

“You’ve been a good boy,” Key coos as he throws away the last rubber band, “Want a reward?” Jonghyun nods like the good puppy he is, although he’s been fisted and spanked already, he hasn’t come even once. Maybe Key will let him now.

“Get on all fours.” Or maybe not.

As soon as Jonghyun is in position Key slaps him, because really what would his ass be without at least one mark on it? Gripping the sheets tightly Jonghyun buries his nose in them, ass pushed higher than before. Key taps his thigh in consent.

“Mmm my favorite display, I’ll give you something good in exchange.” Jonghyun shivers in anticipation. Key always keeps his promises. Always.

The younger spreads his cheeks open before lapping a fat stripe up his balls, pausing a moment to bite down, and then he’s circling the rim with his tongue and _damn_. Jonghyun’s moaning like the grade-A slut he is when Key practically dives forward to lick inside and suck or whatever it is he’s doing, because Jonghyun is too far gone to process the pleasure he’s going through.

And then Key is gone. Jonghyun’s making sounds he would be embarrassed to hear in an AV himself, but he can’t stop it, Key has to come back.

“Ssshh easy Jonghyunie,” Key whispers against his ear and Jonghyun relaxes in an instant. The younger kisses him and it’s wet and dirty (because Jonghyun was sucking Key’s dick only an hour or so ago and Key’s tongue was in Jonghyun’s ass just now), but much more wet than dirty.

“Easy,” Key repeats as he slowly rubs Jonghyun’s back, “It’s only water.”

“Wh-wha?” Jonghyun manages to sputter, because seriously he’s not following. But Key doesn’t explain, he just kisses Jonghyun again and again until, until what actually? Until the bottle is empty, Key says, but Jonghyun still doesn’t get it. Maybe Key read some article about dehydration or something, that would be so like him.

It’s not that, but the true reason is also totally like Key. Jonghyun doesn’t even have a chance to protest when Key rams the empty bottle inside him like it’s the most normal thing in the world. He loses consciousness again only to wake up when Key slaps his face, hard. For a moment Jonghyun swears he sees a glint of worry in his chocolate eyes and he smiles. _It’s okay_.

 

After Key jerks off on Jonghyun’s face (what can he say, they were going down the dirty road anyway) and makes Jonghyun shoot so hard he faints (again), he cleans up their mess and changes the sheets.

The next time Jonghyun wakes up it’s dark. His boyfriend is sleeping next to him, soft breath tickles the elder’s cheek, and he can feel the pressure of a bandage around his knee. A warm fuzzy sensation takes over his entire body as he edges closer and tucks his head under Key’s chin.

“Marry me?”


End file.
